You know what tastes good? Cake. You know what tastes even better than cake? FREE CAKE!

We get spammed senseless with free cake requests and discounts etc ranging from the innocent and harmless, example for charities (which while we cannot say yes to all the time but we do what we can) to laugh-out-loud silly and unbelievably entitled from large brands and "celebrities".

As the requests get bolder and more ridiculous I've started sharing some of them on our Instagram to which I've been getting an immense response - fellow bakers and various small business owners ranging from photographers, musicians, designers, and hair and make-up artists, to even members of the general public who are completely surprised that this practice even goes ON. I've even created a handy flowchart for "influencers" on the hunt for freebies.

Influencer Freebies Flowchart

So I thought I'd start a compilation of my most ridiculous enquiries. Some of them to which I have responded to as well...just for giggles.

1. Celebrity Birthday Cake! For a MEGA STAR.

Celebrity Birthday Cake! For A Mega Star

So mega that they can't buy a cake with cash. We passed on this. Duh. But I cried buckets when I saw someone actually created a beautiful two-tiered Unicorn birthday cake for this event gratis. I cried because I missed out on such mega exposure bucks. I'm kidding. I cried because when celebs can't afford cakes, we know we're properly heading into austerity...

2. Emoji Cake for Hot Shot Guests

Emoji Cake Review
Emoji Cake to BUY!

You'll be pleased to know I did respond to this.

"Hi xxxxxxxx,

Your email upset me, even if you did not intend for it to.


It upset me because I too have expensive tastes and I could never go to Alexander McQueen for a handbag I really want but couldn't afford, and ask for it free or discounted, in exchange of a thank you of potentially carrying it in front of my VIP friends, ones with extremely deep pockets and similar expensive tastes. I can't be anything but blunt but that is how I have translated your request.


I hope you can see my point of view. In any case we are fully booked for your date.

Regards,
Reshmi"

She seemed nice-ish enough in her enquiry, if a bit guilt trippy, but probably had no idea how such emails comes across to the other side. Hope she does now!

3. X-Factor Loser Birthday

 

I don't know who Saara is but even her PR isn't a winner when it comes to blagging freebies 😂 #Imnotpeggy

A post shared by Reshmi Bennett (@angesdesucre) on

 

I repeat...I'm NOT PEGGY. Oh dear...if you're going to blag a freebie, at least get the addressee right. I don't even know who won the X-Factor, let alone lost. Also, dare I ask which illustrious press will be covering this prestigious event?? Oh wait...none.

4. Non-Exposure Bucks

Non Exposure Bucks

You heard me...non-exposure bucks. JUST to tempt slebs in their dressing gowns. Besides, aren't most slebs petrified of gluten, sugar, anything that remotely bloats before any public appearance?? This sounds like intentional torture to me.

5. Free Advertising at Weddings

Bride: "My wedding is day after tomorrow and I need 27 custom macarons urgently, can I have a discount on either the macarons or free delivery please because it is a bulk short notice order for you so quick money?? I can pay cash on delivery so no taxes for you too??You can send business cards and I will give to my friends so they all order from you."

 

Me: "I'm really sorry to disappoint but we actually charge a supplement fee on rush orders, the Royal Mail postman will not be accepting any payments on our behalf and more importantly, we pay our taxes. If everyone did the same perhaps the economy might be better. Also, as your enquiry is borderline insulting we have no capacity for your non-bulk order now or ever."

 

Bride: "Your email is RUDE!!! I am trying to do a favour for small business like yours and it is illegal to not sell for this reason I am going to report you to police for this illegal reply!!! And also write on Twitter and Facebook and Google."

*Bracing myself for internet police and review onslaught*

 

Sometimes, you can only laugh!

I hope you enjoyed this post as much as I did recounting how strange and wonderful the world of freebie blagging is. If you fancy buying cake, head this way.

 

Lots of love,

Reshmi xoxo

11 Responses

Matt

Matt

April 11, 2022

Hey fellow rslash viewers. I too came here for this treasure trove of content. A few of these beggars made me laugh waaay too much.

Rafał

Rafał

December 17, 2020

I am also from rSlash. Great cakes.
I am so glad now that I am not using Instagram.
Keep on posting..it is a lot of fun.

Gina

Gina

September 20, 2020

Came here from R/Slash’s video –
This is outrageous, but it’s nice to see that you have a positive outlook and humor to make a joke out of it. Keep up the astonishing work!

r/slash

r/slash

September 14, 2020

Impressive

Mike Langensiepen

Mike Langensiepen

August 23, 2020

So many choosing beggars around but at least it makes for fun reading. Thank you!

Linzi

Linzi

March 14, 2019

I just adore your responses to these cheeky and rude folk Reshmi! Mine would have included far more expletives!

Jen

Jen

March 14, 2019

I can’t believe the super high end hair dressers didn’t make the cut (excuse the pun). I vaguely remember a repeated email exchange of something like …. “but aren’t social media posts worth more than payment?!”

Becky

Becky

March 12, 2019

Best thing I’ve ever read. I seriously admire your integrity and your quick wit!! Keep it up gurllll x

Lindzi

Lindzi

June 22, 2017

Omg the last one ? Absolutely ridiculous!!!

Verity

Verity

June 22, 2017

Love it. I can’t believe how rude some people are. The best one though is the bride. Too funny.
Keep up the fab cakes.

Terry

Terry

June 22, 2017

Actually couldn’t stop laughing at the bride one at the end!
Did you ever hear from the police about your “illegal reply”? ?

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